Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
