So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
