yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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