are you still at the devil's house?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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