You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
