we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
he shaved USA in his pubs
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
