2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
They should really pass out barf bags in church
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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