wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
