is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
