I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
