My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize