So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
