Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
