is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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