Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
