she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
