is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Randomize
