Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
