I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
