there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
