it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
