when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Everything about him screamed your future.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
