Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you would pick up someone in the library
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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