You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
