Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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