Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
