So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
