Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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