How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
