honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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