The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
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