Your mouth is God's brothel.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize
