so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
