He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
