There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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