On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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