My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
