the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize