you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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