i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize
