I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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