i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize