her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
