I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize