I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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