I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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