I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Just invented taco cereal.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
