At least make sure they are 18
Why
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Randomize
