More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
