this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
