Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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